It has been a long, bumpy ride, filled with danger, excitement, and some stuff about water pistols, but we made it, loyal readers. We made it to 250 posts.
Being a naturally lazy person, with little or no inherent motivation to do anything that requires any effort whatsoever, getting to post 250 is a big achievement for me. It gives me hope that one day I might reach as many as 260, or even 285 posts! Can you imagine?
But let’s not get carried away. For now, let us enjoy post 250 for what it is – one post more than 249, and one less than 251. Look at it sitting there, all quarter-of-1000-esque in its charm and beauty.
Of course, 250 is a special number anyway. We all know there were 250 Munchkins in the Wizard of Oz (of which 4 didn’t commit suicide on set). There were 250 drafts of the script to Star Wars: The Phantom Menace, each one infinitely worse than the one before. And, of course, there are 250 days in a year, if you take away 115 other days first. It really is a special, almost magical number, which is why I feel it must be celebrated.
But how to celebrate? A party? My house isn’t big enough for all of you to come. A special plaque of some kind? No, that costs money, and I’m far too tight to spend any.
So how about a giveaway? Two giveaways, in fact?
THE GREAT 250th POST GIVEAWAY #1
You’ve probably heard about my children’s horror novel, the frankly brilliant Invisible Fiends: Mr Mumbles. Maybe you already have a copy. But do you have a signed one? Signed and dedicate to YOU? Or to someone else you know? Do you? No? Well then this is the giveaway for you.
One lucky winner (just one, mind) will win a signed and dedicated copy of the book. To enter, you just have to leave a comment on this post, making sure you include your correct email address so I can get in touch with you if you win. The comment can be anything you like, as long as it makes some kind of vague, coherent sense. No single word/single letter comments, please. Say hello. Chat about the weather. Tell me you love me (you don’t ever do that any more). Whatever. Just leave a comment and you’ll be entered into the draw. The winner will be drawn on 27th April.
THE GREAT 250th POST GIVEAWAY #2
But like I said, there can be only one winner of the signed book. For those of you who don’t win (and for the lucky so-and-so who does) I’m offering another book for you to download and enjoy for FREE!
This is one of my early attempts at writing a children’s book. It’s a comedy sci-fi adventure for 9-12 year olds, called Johnny B. Weeyerd and the Cosmic Annihilator. It has everything – aliens, super-powers, purple hot dogs – they’re all in there somewhere, waiting to titilate and excite your eyes. It’s a first draft, so it’s far from perfect, but hopefully it’s enjoyable all the same.
The file is in PDF format, so you’ll need Adobe Acrobat Reader to open it, but that comes as standard on most PCs, so you shouldn’t have any problems. You are free to download the ebook, read it, pass it on to your friends, whatever takes your fancy. Try selling it or profiting from it in any way, though, and I swear to the gods I will hunt you down and beat you with a rubber hose. Capiche?
Grab your copy of the ebook by clicking here. You might need to right click and select “Save Target As”, depending on how your browser is set up.
So that’s it for post 250. Get leaving those comments to be in with a chance of winning a copy of Mr Mumbles, and if you read JBW, be sure to let me know what you think.